Netflix Series "Sirens" Not Enough to Lure Me Onto the Rocks

 

Sirens:

In spite of the fact that it provides work for actors, I would avoid this one. Maybe avoid my review too, because I quit after about three quarters into the first episode.  Perhaps it morphs into something beautiful, riotous, or mysterious but I haven’t got that far. 

 Seemed like every trope and cliché of modern film was there. The chasm between rich and poor was there from the opening scenes, hyper-colorized in the style of La La Land.  Another too obvious cliché is that of a young girl in bed with an older rich guy in a scene that is neither cute, clever, nor meaningful.   

So there are two sisters from Buffalo on different paths. Devon works at a fast-food restaurant while Simone is a sort of Devil-Wears-Prada assistant to an Anna Wintour type on some super-rich planet like Nantucket Island (it’s not really that – it’s much richer) .

Their old man has senile dementia and appears to be dying back in Buffalo.  I think every film family must have a head of family with Alzheimer’s, or some form of body paralysis, or cancer, or. ..   Well you can make your own list. 

So of course Devon is going to go to her sister seeking help with her dad.  She’s everything princess Simone is not. She smokes, curses, dresses Goth-like.  Of course she’s going to embarrass her sister in front of her high-society employers. 

But the dialogue is mostly terrible throughout and doesn’t give the actors much to work with.  While on a ferry boat out to the island, for example, the boat captain berates her for trying to smoke a cigarette (which is not allowed on board). 

Devon pouts and says ‘but I need something in my mouth’.  Jump cut to someone’s bright idea and a long shot where she’s fellating the captain.  Ha-ha, how funny!   Low humor, like Shakespeare!  Except that Shakespeare was talented and knew the difference between talent and degradation.

Okay so why am I giving it three stars?  Well, because it’s tough being and actor and they’re often unemployed. The people who produced this film did a public service by lowing the ranks of the unemployed.  Besides, there are plenty of desperate people out there with nothing better to do.  I indict myself there for spending almost a whole hour watching this.