Obama Aide Hillary Dale
Look here, Barack, we need to issue a statement on this campaign financing thing pronto! And I mean RIGHT QUICK!
Barack Obama
Where are my cigarettes?
Obama Aide Hillary Dale (frowns)
Are you listening, Barack? We don't have a moment to spare...
Barack Obama
Not now, Hillary... I'm looking for my butts....
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
I hid them in the lower right hand drawer of my desk...
Barack Obama
Your desk?...Why your desk? Why not my own desk?
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
The key is under the desk calendar on Axes desk.
Barack Obama
What the hell? I need....a cigarette... right quick. Yes, that's right. A cigarette.
Hillary Dale impatently rushes over to Axelrod's desk and retrieves the key from under the desk calendar. Barack Obama looks impatient, watching her intently.
Barack Obama (now smiling)
Sweetie.... Why is the key on Axes desk and not my own?
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
He told me to keep it there. He says that's the only way we can get a grip on the situation.
Barack Obama
Situtation? What situation?
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
The number of cigarettes you're smoking and the progress you're making in quitting.
Barack Obama
Quitting? I've already told Axe that I did quit once already. I can quit again. No problema! But not just now...
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
Here's the key....three cigarettes is all you can get today. Strict orders. And David says you must smoke in the lav.
Hillary retrieves the pack from the drawer and hands a cigarette to Obama who takes it and grins sheeplishly, then bounds off.
Barack Obama
Back in a flash...or a puff of smoke!
Obama goes off to the lavatory to smoke his cigarette, calling behind him as he moves off:
Barack Obama (continued)
Get that statement ready on public campaign financing. I'll look it over when I come back.
Obama Aide Hillary Dale
Don't forget to turn on the exhaust fan. And use that mouthwash that's in the closet. Mika Brezinski will be here for your interview at nine.
Fade to black....
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