The Monkey Speaks: Ode to the Democratic Presidential Candidates

We’ll write the story
And then we’ll find the facts.
We’re not concerned with truth
So much as political attacks

Obfuscation is our credo,
Litigation is our game.
We’ll tie you up in paper
And save the facts for later.

Nancy is our General
Hilary, our appointed Queen
The Breck Boy carries water
Barak is on our team.

Rumsfeld was a tyrant,
We whined until he quit.
Have you ever seen such brilliance
Since the days of Lilliput?

Mexicans are wonderful
When they’re not Attorneys General.
Gonzales dissed our judges
And now must bear our grudges

We’re for the troops of course
But not if they cost us money
We’re at the front on Terror
But the Army is in error.

We like to praise Bin Laden
Imagining him alive and prospering
It rankles Georgie Bush
And wins us friends in Hindu Kush.

Please don’t call me liberal.
The word is out of date.
It may seem a bit obsessive,
But I’m both mainstream and Progressive.

I wouldn’t say we’re evil
I wouldn’t say we’re nice
So we’ll just write the stories
And then supply the facts.

By Moeursalen