Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Tipper Gore Kicks Al Gore to the Curb

Could anyone be more boring than Al Gore? Tipper believes not, and though it was announced last month that the Gores bought a 9 million dollar home on the California Coast, it wasn't enough to compensate for Al Gore's terminal odiousness. Tipper's been embarrassed by hubby Al ever since that dopey/sloppy kiss at the 2000 political convention.

Well, you've got to give Al Gore lots of credit for figuring out how to scam millions from the global warming fiasco. Even as he buys those giant homes with their energy absorbing luxury comforts, and even as he belches carbon from his private jets, he's got plain folks feeling plenty guilty if they turn the heat up past 60 in the winter.

So Al Gore and Tipper Gore are parting ways, leaving Al to cruise the California coast for younger chicks. Get a clue though, Al, you're going to have to lose the paunch. Why don't you sign up for one of those fat farms where they make you park your jet for a while and blubber around the indoor track?

Oh, and if you should get lucky flashing your millions around Montecito, don't start talking to the girl about "global warming." She'll think you're weird. Well, you are weird, but... well, you know...pretend...you know how to pretend, don't you?

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