Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Terrorism For Dummies: Free Advice for Al Qaeda

If you're planning any terrorist attacks, we would strongly advise you wait until President Obama and the Democrats lift certain provisions in the Patriot Act which will soon expire. You can spend the waiting time collecting additional telephone numbers, because you'll be safe with new numbers after the Democrats go into inaction. After the Obama team rescinds ROVING WIRETAPS which discriminate against hard working terrorists, all you'll have to do to escape detection is use one of your other phone numbers.

Secondly, you are advised to stop registering your organizations under the Foreign Agent Registration Act. We know it is your habit to report to the authorities when you begin operating in the U.S.--by registering under this Act. Keep in mind you can't be required to register unless you are already proven guilty of terrorist activity. Obviously, you can't be proved a terrorist, even if you are one, without registering under this Act. (Note: similar registration requirements which would apply to drug smugglers and dealers are being considered).

Look at your guy, Zazi, who was just arrested for planning an attack on New York City to coincide with 9-11. Had he read our book "Terrorism for Dummies" he would have taken our advice and waited.

An added benefit of waiting is so that Al Qaeda headquarters has an opportunity to regroup after those murderous assaults by American troops in Afghanistan. Al Qaeda headquarters in Afghanistan will support your endeavors, once the Democratic party politicians in Washington have launched their offensive on behalf of World Wide Terrorism, also known as the "overseas contingency operation."

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